Well, I honestly think I'm back to being "depressed". It's been a good 10-12 years since I've been at this point. Luckily, I'm able to pin point it since I've been there before. However, I'm more stubborn in my old age and needed my husband to kick me in the ass. I just keep hoping it'll go away. But, it doesn't. I have so much to be happy about, and when I think about it, I am happy about everything that is happening in life right now. Things are going really well! But, I'm just always sad, irritable, anxious, or otherwise crabby! It seems to be a vicious cycle, as well. I was reading up on depression and the same feelings that are considered symptoms can also cause depression. So, if one is overly anxious, stressed, etc., their depression can be increased. I definitely have HUGE control issues and when I feel "out of control" I stress hardcore. No matter how much I tell myself to buck up, relax and smile, I can't. So, I'm trying some St. John's Wort first, before I go back on the meds. Hopefully I will be jumping like a crazy person on a couch soon, one way or another, either because I'm happy or clinically insane.
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